Have you ever felt the Lord screaming at you through something? Before today I can honestly say I have never experienced that. I have felt the Lord calling to me, but never screaming at me to get my attention.
Today in class we talked about sticking to God's agenda and not our own. I'm not going to lie, as soon as we started class I wanted to shut the book and go home. I knew this message was for me.
For the past few weeks I have been so focused on my agenda and the things I have wanted. I have wanted a new car for a while now and began the search about a month ago. Things seemed to be falling into place, got approved for a loan, the payments were reasonable, my insurance wouldn't be too horrible. But I couldn't find a car that met the loan requirement, so I kept looking and looking.
In the middle of this, my friend tells me she is moving to Texas in the fall and she thinks I should move with her. Yeah, sure. Just pick up everything and move, that doesn't seem scary at all. I told her sure, I'd pray about it and let her know. So with that on the back burner I continued my unsuccessful car search. I felt like I was getting no where. I was frustrated and confused. It seemed so right at the start and now I was no where closer to getting a car. Even my friends were telling me that I needed to be sure that getting a car right now is the best thing.
A few days ago I was doing my devotions and in the book it was saying how we need to be so unattached to the things of this world. Literally living with open hands so you could go to wherever the Lord wants you to go. Nothing holding you back to His calling. At that point I really started thinking about Texas and the door that the Lord might be opening. If I take out a loan for a car, I am tying myself up for 4 years, and I could be saying no to God. I don't want to ever put myself in a position to say no to God's will for my life.
With today's lesson it really helped me finalize my decision on not getting a car at the moment. I can clearly see that it's not in God's agenda. I don't know if I am supposed to go to Texas or not, but what I do know is that I am free to go wherever He calls me.
I hope that next time it won't take him screaming at me to get my attention. He has a plan, and I need to open up my heart, ears, and hands and just go.
